Neglected

52 Sources of Inspiration

1. Journal writing
2. My puppies
3. Rainbow coloured beads in a glass jar
4. The smell of rain on asphalt
5. A really good night's sleep
6. A new gel pen
7. Dreams
8. Stationary stores
9. Payday
10. Time off from work
11. Photography
12. Other people's blogs
13. Art supplies
14. Painting
15. Cupcakes
16. Rainy days and warm blankets
17. Trip planning
18. New books arriving in the mail
19. My Ipod on shuffle setting
20. My favourite podcasts
21. Bright coloured summer dresses
22. Post it notes
23. Ribbons attached to USB drives
24. Ponytails
25. The smell of soil and freshly mowed grass
26. Warm pasta in my tummy
27. Bubble baths
28. L'Occitane products
29. A really good book
30. A really good guidebook to writing
31. Sedona, Arizona
32. New pyjamas from Frankie and Johnny
33. A long and laughter filled conversation with a friend over a good meal
34. Water, and lots of it
35. Swimming
36. A trip to the library
37. Taking my laptop to Dome after work and writing for an hour or two with a skinny cap
38. Reading books I wish I had written myself and learning from them
39. Hearing people talk with passion about what it is they want to do or are doing with their lives
40. Chalk an chalk boards, whiteboard markers and whiteboards, paints and canvas
41. The colours green and sky blue
42. Connections to my past - to family members gone, friends departed and the knowledge that I'm always moving forward and becoming a better person
43. Sleep ins on a Saturday morning
44. Perspective
45. Venice, Italy; Isle of Cumbrae, Scotland
46. Museums and galleries
47. Workshops and classes and the people I meet in them
48. People are watching, supporting and loving me, even if they can't be with me in this world
49. Money in the bank
50. Coffee
51. The beach - it calls to me like a siren
52. The knowledge that I'm already here

Exercise suggested from 52 Projects: Random Acts of Everyday Creativity

A day like no other

I woke up early this morning, anxious and fearful.

I decided there was nothing else to do but make today a day like no other.

All of my mornings start with these two faces.

Some mornings start with pancakes.

I wrote in my journal for an hour non stop, that's it in the bottom of the photo.
Then I watched an episode on the net of 16 and Pregnant.

I went to MILKD. I never go here. I go across the street, sit at the same table in the same cafe with the same waitress. Today I went inside the trendy cafe.

I drank my skinny cap and marked assessments.
First self portrait. It's bad, but that's okay. I never take self portraits and rarely post photos of myself on my blog.


On a whim, I decided to get on the train to Fremantle.

I went to

And ate...


a yummy cheeseburger. That's my first Vonnegut on the left. I bought it in the second hand store a little bit down from Soho.

Second self portrait of the day - in the bathroom of Soho. Not much better than the first.
Then I wandered about a bit, window shopping.
Then I got on the train, where the view out the window looked like this:

Ocean, ocean, ocean.

When I got back to my stop I went here


Where the roof looks like this:

And I drank a chai latte and did more marking.

I was pretty over it at this point, so I went home and watched more episodes of 16 and Pregnant, almost blowing my monthly internet allowance 10 days shy of the next allowance and did more marking.

It truly was a day like no other.
I took risks.
Forced myself to do things I'd rather not do.
Looked at the place I live through the lens of my camera.
Got lots of assessments marked.
Found Kurt Vonnegut.

Survived another day.

Where does the wind blow?

Fate's Gate, New Zealand

The edits on the novel are kicking my ass.

Mollie Moo's ear is better. She whines when I put the ear drops in. There is nothing aggressive inside of her. She won't believe I would hurt her on purpose, so she cries to make me understand she's sad. No one loves me as totally as Mollie Moo does. I am imperfectly perfect to her. Thank God I found her.

I made it through a couple of books from the Clear Away The Clutter Read-a-thon. Not as many as I would have liked, but I made a start. Fallen was lovely, Vampire Academy was sassy. It's good to immerse myself in fiction when I'm writing. I don't understand writers who don't read when they're writing. How do they stand it?

I'm watching the Sarah Connor Chronicles, season two. I'm into it, but man is it depressing.

Where does the wind blow? The wind blows to predestination, my darling. You can see it from Fate's Gate.

Sunday Salon: Hush Hush; The Writer's Mentor

I've been absent from Sunday Salon - and from this blog in general - for a long time.

I'm back.

Hush Hush


That has to be one of the most amazing book covers I've ever seen. However, it is also the cause of the major problem I had with the book. First things first - I liked this story. It was extremely easy to read, Nora is a generally likable character, Patch is a classic bad-boy-come-good-but-still-oh-so-bad-where-it-counts, and there are some good moments of tension between the two main characters.

The Major Problem: The cover gives it all away - Patch is a fallen angel. We can SEE that before we even start reading and yet nothing is actually said about fallen angels until about two thirds into the book. That's a very looooong time to wait for a pay off.

There are some minor problems too - Nora is obsessed with Patch in an almost Bella-Edward kind of way. The parallels between Hush Hush and Twilight are easy to see - *spoiler* Patch wants to kill Nora for most of the book because the only way for him to become human is to sacrifice her. He changes his mind when he falls in love with her, of course, but not before he's almost killed her on a roller coaster and thought about stabbing her with a kitchen knife. *end spoiler* Readers of Twilight might like that sort of obsession and love/hate kill/live stuff but grown up feminists like myself find it all sits a bit awkwardly to say the least.

There is a sequel - Crescendo - due out in November 2010. I'll probably read it but like the copy of Hush Hush I read, it is strictly borrowing from the library material. With all of the above in mind though, I'd recommend it.


I borrowed this book from the local library. These days I tend to request books on my To Be Read list more than I browse around looking for likely suspects to fall off the shelves and into my hands. But that's exactly what The Writer's Mentor did. I was looking for a different book (which wasn't there) and found this one. I'm really enjoying it, hence my last two blog posts being quotes from this book. I've read a lot of books about writing in the last few years - some are excellent, some are okay and some are not so great. I burned out on hearing advice about writing six months or so ago and just got stuck into the writing. Now I'm coming out of that phase and moving into editing I'm looking for some guidance.

Ian Jackman is providing that guidance. This isn't a deep book on how to plot or build character or edit. It is a book of advice from authors intended for other authors on a wide range of topics such as inspiration, style, time and space, audience and form. I'm almost half way through and I've found some great quotes that have really helped me with my edits!

Finally, I've just started Frostbitten, the fourth book in Kelley Armstrong's Elena Michaels series. I have to be done with it by Thursday so I can start on my Clear Away the Clutter Read-a-Thon, so we'll see how it goes.

Happy Sunday!

The Writer's Mentor - Ann Douglas, Caroline Joy Adams, Elizabeth Bowen

"[Hemingway] understood...that what the writer knows but omits will show up in what he writes as a sense of unstated depth that is more powerful than any attempt to describe the indescribable can be. Good prose, Hemingway insisted again and again, must be like an iceberg, seven-eighths submerged; like dynamite packed under a bridge..."

- Ann Douglas

This idea speaks to me as I struggle to express my character's thoughts. My mind screams SHOW, DON'T TELL but perhaps equally powerful is that which I do not tell or show, that which hovers in the background. I should also give Hemingway another go - I've only ever read The Old Man and the Sea and that was a long time ago.

"Sensory details are critical to powerful writing because they can set a mood; evoke a huge array of feelings; trigger memories for both your character or your readers; and draw them into believing that they are right there, in that scene, in that moment, inside your character's mind."

- Caroline Joy Adams

I want so much for people to be inside October's mind, to feel what she feels and see what she sees. It is my greatest hope for my work.

"One cannot 'make' characters, only marionettes. The manipulated movement of the marionette is not the 'action' necessary for plot. Characterless action is not action at all, in the plot sense. It is the indivisibility of the act from the actor, and the inevitability of that act on the part of that actor, that gives action verisimilitude*. Without that, action is without force or reason. Forceless, reasonless action disrupts plot. The term 'creation of character' is misleading. Characters pre-exist. They are found. They reveal themselves slowly to the novelists perception - as might fellow traveler's seated opposite one in a very dimply-lit railway carriage."

- Elizabeth Bowen

*Verisimilitude means giving something the appearance of being true or real. I had to look that one up!

I identify with the comments here about characters and it applies to my setting too. People ask me why I set my novel in Arizona. I didn't - the novel set itself there. It say down and said "here" and I said "Okay, I can work with that."


All quotes are from Ian Jackman's The Writer's Mentor. I'm really enjoying the short pithy chapters with their delicate drops of wisdom. I highly recommend it to anyone in the editing process.

The Writer's Mentor - Peter Straub

"I don't read much horror, though I like the idea of horror, the idea of a nasty, subversive genre, the purpose of which is to upend conventional ideas of good taste, and to speak truths otherwise ignored or suppressed. I think that's really worthy."

- Peter Straub quoted in Ian Jackman's The Writer's Mentor: Secrets of success from the world's greatest writers. I totally agree with him. It's like the idea of a dirty thought hanging out in a clean mind - deliciously recalcitrant.

Clear Away The Clutter Read-a-Thon

I've joined the Clear Away the Clutter Read-a-Thon hosted by The Neverending Shelf. I'm excited because it is my first read-a-thon and my first challenge really. I read about these challenges on other people's blogs and think "I'd love to do that!" but for some reason I've never actually committed to taking part. Still, the important thing is I'm here now, ready to join in.

The read-a-thon begins 7am April 5 and ends 11pm April 11. I'm guessing those aren't my local times, but near enough is good enough. Thankfully this is one of the weeks I have a break from work so I fully intend to read, read, read without pesty work getting in the way.

Here is my list of books to be read (so far):

The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer (I'm halfway through and have stalled)
Swan by Frances Hayes (Again, I'm halfway through and have stalled)
Casino Royale by Ian Fleming (I own all of the James Bond books and haven't read any)
The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr (read about a quarter of this a while back but couldn't get into it)
Fallen by Lauren Kate (really excited about this one)
Vampire Academy by Richelle Mean (a re-read to get up to date for the three following books in the series that I own but haven't read)
The Left Hand of God by Paul Hoffman (bought on impulse a few weeks ago)

I have no idea if this is too many books or not enough. I'll be happy with any progress though and I know I can power through books easily when I focus. I've taken the advice of The Neverending Shelf and chosen a combination of longer books with a few shorter ones thrown in.

Can't wait to get started!

Where my best impulses have taken me

My Mondo Beyondo lesson for the day asks me where my best impulses have taken me.

My best impulses have taken me around the world. I have inhabited strange cities, built a life myself in a foreign country, met people who invite me to places like Jamaica to finish writing my book and actually mean it, walked under the Italian sun, found constellations in the roof of a cave, walked the path of the samurai, felt insignificant next to several of the wonders of the world and knitted my own self into the fabric of manyplaces and many different people.

My best impulses saw me sign up for a writing and yoga retreat in Guatemala. I was so sorry after I had paid for the retreat. If I could have canceled I would have. I was overwhelmed with strangeness, with change. I didn't think I could fly to Guatemala and find my way to the retreat. I did, and it was one of those decisions that just made sense. It led me to my writing self, which led me to October.

My best impulses (with help from a friend's sage advice) saw me refuse yet another corporate, soul draining job and accept a position much less secure which has supported me extremely well as I write. I remember wishing fervently that I could find a job that paid me enough to earn the sort of money I earned in a full time job but only work part time. I thought it was an impossible dream, but it is my reality now.

My best impulses put me on a plane headed for someone who is a very dear friend now. I trusted when there was no promise of anything, and though it took some years, I see how grace caught me. I see her hands on me. I see her guiding me.

It's more than I've believed in for a very long time. And my best impulses say it is enough.

Mondo Beyondo Energizers

I'm working through the Mondo Beyondo e-course with Jen Lemen and Andrea Scher.

Today it is time to list my natural energizers, the things that I always enjoy doing and the things that give me a lift in my day and a spring in my step. I decided to create a photo post for this one, and all of the images except the photos of Hopie and Mollie are taken from Google Images.

1. Dancing


2. Cleaning up


3. Writing


4. Reading


5. Yoga


6. Art and craft


7. Singing


8. Hopie and Mollie




9. The beach

Preparing for NaNoWriMo

November means one thing and one thing only...it's NaNoWriMo time!

For the uninitiated NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month. Held every November, writers from all over the world pledge to write 50,000 words in one month. The idea is to write a complete novel from start to finish. At an average of 1666 words a day, it's more about quantity than quality but it is a LOT of fun.

Last year I was a bit naughty and continued on with my in progress novel and it got a huge shot in the arm, even if probably only 20,000 of those words made it to the novel (which is in the drafting and editing stage right now). This year I'm starting something knew which I have tentatively entitled Gods and Jukeboxes. Yeah, I know, pretty random title. I only have the briefest of ideas and I really just want to see what bats fly out of my attic. Could be something, could be nothing.

I'm joining Andrea's NaNoWriMo group at her blog A Cat of Impossible Colour as well as linking in with Perth based NaNo groups for write ins and general companionship in the writing process which can be a bit solitary.

So here's to you November 2009 - at your end I hope I have 50,000 words of something!

I am so glad that work no longer makes me feel like this

Sadly I can't find the author of this cartoon

I used to feel this way about work. It was soul destroying and miserable for me to get up five days a week and go to a job I didn't enjoy. I was always planning for the next job, the next holiday. Anything to get me out of the daily grind.

I had a choice to make about 3 or so months back. I was offered a full time permanent job with a government agency (which makes it seriously permanent) or casual work as a Lecturer. I was very tempted to take the full time job. It had Security. It had a guaranteed income. And as I'd been happily out of work for 6 months that sounded mighty attractive. What if I took the casual job and it didn't last? What if the hours weren't enough? It was a dilemma.

The easy choice would have been the full time job. I know what it is to live that life - making good money, hating my job, dreading Sunday night because it precedes Monday, planning holidays I can't afford to pay for up front, thus resulting in work not being an option, but a necessity to pay credit card bills.

I made the other choice. I chose the casual yet uncertain work. And I have seriously never been happier with my work situation. The job teaching is fine - it isn't boring and there are parts of it I really like. The money is good enough that I make only slightly less working 12 hours a week than I did working 38. There is lots of time for me to write and several days off where I can do my thing.

It is probably the best decision I've made in a long time and it has made a lot of difference to my quality of life. It took some bravery to get there, but I am glad I took that leap.

The Joy Diet: Truth in Dance

I have had my moments of stillness this week.

Several times I sat quietly and tried to distance myself from my thoughts, to let them roll over me like wave after wave of rushing, noisy water. It was hard, very hard. I was gentle with myself about this. I am not experienced at meditation and to expect 15 minutes of perfect stillness straight away is not realistic for me.

I also tried other forms of stillness - one was dancing. Now technically dancing doesn't sound like stillness, but while my body is dancing my mind has no room to think. I'm with the music, I'm with my body, I'm in that moment. And that is the essence of stillness I think.

After dancing I wrote down the follow words in response to the truth question:

What do I feel?

• Unbound
• Passionate
• Buzzy
• Brave
• Able to do anything
• Fluid
• Happy

I love to dance but I simply don't do it anymore. I'm heavier than I was in highschool when I'd come home to an empty house, put on my dancing clothes, turn up the CD player (it was new technology then. Ha!) and dance, dance, dance. I just loved the way it made me feel.

Then I grew up a bit more, went to university and I stopped making time to dance. Now, 15 years later, I almost never dance. Part of it is that I can ignore the heaviness of my body if I don't move it a lot. Those extra 30 pounds or so are barely noticeable if I hide from my body. That's sad, isn't it?

What hurts?
No longer dancing.

What is the painful story I'm telling?
I no longer dance because I'm too fat and too frightened to feel that.

Can I be sure my painful story is true?
It isn't. My dancing today proved that. I can still enjoy dancing.

Is my painful story working?
Well, it was. :) Now, not so much.

Can I think of another story that might work better?
I can dance whenever I like, whenever I want to feel free and fluid and passionate. There is nothing holding me back.

I really enjoyed Truth this week. I'm going to keep telling myself these truths and keep trying to get to the bottom of the stories I'm telling myself, which ones are working and which ones are holding me back.

I also want to consider this question more often:

Of the options open to me, which one brings the most love into the world?

Excuse me, I'm going to dance right now!

I also wrote an additional post this week entitled The Joy Diet: Truth in Failure

The Joy Diet: Truth in Failure

After my almost 15 minutes of stillness - this time lying down and trying to empty my mind - I ask the question Martha Beck poses - what am I feeling? The answer is failure.

Not so much failure at stillness (although I still find it to be very difficult to empty my mind and this has been the reason why meditation has never "stuck" as a practice for me) but just a sense of not being good enough, not knowing enough, not offering enough.

What hurts?
My heart, my losses and disappointments.

What is the painful story I am telling?
I am not good enough, nor will I ever be good enough. I have failed to complete tasks, failed to undertake tasks. My body has failed me, and I have failed it. I have disappointed people. There is no compassion for me, I am undeserving of that which I extend to others.

Can I be sure my painful story is true?
My painful story is equal parts truth and lie. I am not perfect (of course I'm not!) but I'm not a scumbag either. I have made mistakes, but they have mostly turned out for the best. What I see as failure is probably equal parts failure and success. All these so called failures have led me to this point, this moment and I am not unhappy with my life or my choices.

Is my painful story working?
Well, it is preventing me from embracing things that have happened to me in the past. It is restricting my vision of events with the sole heading of FAILURE. So no, I don't think I'm doing myself any favours.

Can I think of another story that might work better?
Oh yes. I am good enough and I have always been good enough. I have had many successes in life and I hold few regrets. The box labeled FAIL is not where I want to put events of my past, present or future. It restricts them - and me - and offers only the ugly sad side of things instead of the complex journey, the good parts of the bad parts, the learning and the understanding. I offer compassion to those ugly bits and I want to look harder and pick out the good stuff.

Here and Now

I am watching Firefly and appreciating its unique vision and compelling story.

I am reading Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr. I've only just started, but I love stories about the dark world of faery.

I am eating cupcakes with pink icing. I made them for the dinner my Mum and I had last night for my Aunt and Uncle. Yum!

I am wishing I was in Japan. It seems to be everywhere at the moment - in books, newspapers, on television, in my memories.

I am writing and it is going well. October's story is starting to take a definite shape and I know her world as well as I do my own.

I can't wait for the world to meet her.

Art in Progress

I don't pretend to be a great artist.

I do not think I am gifted at art, or have any particular aptitude for painting or drawing.

I'm an imperfect artist, because my art comes from me, from who I am, from my imperfect self. I paint because I enjoy it. I like putting the paint on the canvas and swirling it about. I like mixing media and trying things out. I like art journaling and paper cutting and creating little wooden dolls. I like clay and glue and stickers.

Creating brings me joy, and the end result of whatever I create is less important than what it took to get there. It took me a long time to understand that. I'm a brave artist, perhaps because I don't have natural talent or ability. I have nothing to prove. And all the joy in the world to discover and hold close to my heart.

This is the wrong way up, but I don't know how to flip photos on blogger. It is based on a dream I had about golden bees chasing me through a gate. It's a work in progress, no where near finished. The bees were tricky and I'm not sure I'm completely sold on them, but whatever. I know they're bees, right? *wink*

Oh, I love this page. This is a page in the Moleskin watercolour journal I'm creating for my cousin for her 30th birthday. I love the cherry blossoms here - they're cotton wool!

This is the first page I did in the Moleskin watercolour journal and my first time playing with watercolours. I love it. She's standing in front of a well. I created this after I read that if you are at the bottom of a well and you look up you will always be able to see the stars, no matter what time of day it is.

The Joy Diet: Nothing

Firstly, here is my vision card for nothing:


My favourite parts are the Japanese writing and the purple elephant. I'm not sure why all of these things evoke the feeling of nothing for me, but I figure that isn't something I need to examine too closely.

I have only just finished the Nothing chapter, so I've really only tried the process of doing "nothing" once, which was today. I haven't had the greatest of luck with previous still meditation so I chose the busy activity, which was cutting out hearts for an art project. It was very steadying, very peaceful just to be in that moment, with those hearts and just let the thoughts come and go. I will definitely be trying more nothing this coming week.

I have the week off from work (yay!) so I'll combine Truth and Nothing and see how it goes. I think I'll be doing a lot of art work this week so we'll see how the themes play out.

Happy Truth week everyone!

Beginning The Joy Diet at Another Chapter

It is time for a new book at The Next Chapter with Jamie Ridler!

This time around the book is The Joy Diet: 10 Daily Practices for a Happier Life by Martha Beck. Jamie chooses such good books. The first time I got a lot out of Soul Coaching, the second time it was Wreck This Journal, which I enjoyed but didn't really participate in the blogging side of things. I was lucky enough to pick up The Joy Diet from my local library, which is always exciting. I live in Western Australia and I have to say, my state has one of the greatest library systems ever. Every time I want a book (and I want a LOT books from a lot of different interest areas) nine times out of ten it is somewhere in the state and they are happy to loan it out via my library that is 5 minutes down the road. So exciting for bookworm like me!

I'm hoping I'll be able to keep up with The Joy Diet. It's a busy time for me with lecturing, keeping up with my reading and assignments for two external university units (I'm really kicking myself that I signed up for them now...studying always sounds great, but the reality of it leaves something to be desired). But here's hoping!

I look forward to undertaking some projects (the vision cards sound fun!) and getting to know my fellow journeyers. Yay!

Mixed Media Painting: Journey

I went to a Mixed Media Painting workshop today. It was taught by Emily and I enjoyed learning some mixed media techniques and messing about with paint, glue and stencils.

I used backgrounds from my trip to Japan - maps of Kyoto, pictures of koi, a postcard. I wasn't sure about my choice to involve purple in amongst the oranges and browns, but I like the result. It was more browns and oranges in my head. I'm going to try some of these techniques in my art journaling, and when I can find someone who has Modge Podge in stock, I'll add that to my supplies.

BlissChick Poster

Just spreading the word from BlissChick. Isn't this poster beautiful?